Why being engaged makes me want to purge my closet.
In 58 days (not that anyone is counting) I get to marry Jeff! Being engaged has been an interesting and beautiful season in my life. Jeff and I are privileged to have grown up in communities with a whole lot of love and we’ve been showered with blessings, gifts, words of wisdom, and well wishes. We are extremely grateful for this season of showering and celebrations. However, in the midst of receiving gifts and beginning to merge our lives, it’s become so apparent to me how easy it is to accumulate stuff.
Prior to engagement, I didn’t really think about what it would be like to merge stuff with someone else. As I’m doing so, I realize that not only are we going to merge addresses and last names, but also our toothbrush holders, closets, and laundry baskets. And, truthfully, it makes me want to purge the stuff in my closet and kitchen that is just taking up space because soon they will take up not only my space, but Jeff’s too.
Because Jeff and I have lived independently for several years, we both already have stuff. [One of the first perks in dating Jeff that I discovered was his fully equipped kitchen; this guy likes to cook!] As the gifts are beginning to arrive and we are preparing to build a nest together, I have found myself becoming more and more interested in having stuff to fill the home. Of course, part of this is due to becoming an adult. For example, we’ve decided it’s a good idea to own a vacuum and acquire furniture that isn’t falling apart or smells like a wet dog. But, part of it is that it’s just so easy to want things to look good and have all that we need in our nest.
So, the task at hand is to find balance in the amount of stuff we have. Our conversations have gone something like this:
“How many cups should we put on the registry? We’d like to have enough for entertaining friends and avoiding dishwasher overuse, but we also don’t want to have cups bulging out of the cabinet. We’ll need at least 12. Maybe we should get rid of the old ones and upgrade to a new, matching set? But, how can I get rid of this pilsner from this one brewery? And, I really want to keep this mug that my Grandma gave me.” And so it goes.
Additionally, as we take the next step in merging our lives together through marriage, we understand that we’re bringing our own non-material stuff to the relationship-the good, the bad, and the ugly. I’m certainly not expecting us to live without ever having the bad or the ugly, but it sure makes me want to purge as much of it as I can to create space for more good.
So, here’s to purging the things in my closet and my life that aren’t serving me (and soon-to-be us) well.